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Sexo y la ciudad May 29, 2008

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Take a look above you–you see that? The giant 00? Yes ladies and gentlemen, the time is finally here. I can’t believe it was just a few months ago (and by a few I mean 10) that we were hearing the rumblings of a “Sex and the City” movie and now it’s happening. Tonight, at 12:01 am (way, way past my bedtime) BFF and I will be parked in those movie seats with Sour Patch Kids and a large coffee, shaking from all the energy drinks that we took, anxiously awaiting the return of our four girls up on the screen. I’ve done something that I normally never, ever do for a movie–and that’s avoid all spoilers. I’ve seen every tv spot and trailer they’ve offered but have avoided any plot details. And let me tell you–it has been HARD!!! You’d be surprised how much is available on the Internet! So yes, I’m very much looking forward to tonight.

However, I’m not looking forward to the two hours I’m going to be forced to spend at the Laundromat. For some reason, when my cats get pissed at me, they piss and shit on the floor and my clothes. I don’t know what is up with them because they just did it again last night. I swear to God, I was ready to throw them out the window this morning. This is NOT what I signed up for when I adopted them and I’m sick of it. Luckily this time they chose to stay away from my Jack Spade bag and instead peed on my Express work shirt. So after work today I’ll be spending some quality time in the Laundromat before my disco nap. Which I am going to have to take because I’s ollllld. But seriously cats…WTF?

WTF, indeed.

The past two nights have been hibernation central for me. Trying to work off the extra pounds before I go home to Ohio on Wednesday. I have to impress everyone, don’t you know. Really looking forward to getting away for a week and doing a whole lot of nothing besides drinking and hanging out with my family! It’s supposed to be a good weekend so I think I’m going to be outside a lot. If anyone wants to go to the park or the pier on Saturday, let me know!

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Yummy Flavors May 27, 2008

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Wow, I have been a BAD blogger lately! The thing that’s really sad is that I’ve had stuff to blog about, I just haven’t gotten around to it. So my apologies to all three of you out there. I will probably be bad the next two weeks as well seeing as I’m going on vacation a week from tomorrow but we’ll see. With this one, you never know what type of blogger he’ll be.

I don’t even know where to start! Let’s start with the tattoo. Well, clearly, I didn’t get it–you would have heard about it by now if I had. Tuesday I started having second thoughts about what I was getting and where I was getting it and I just feel like if I have any doubts I should wait. So I’m still wanting to get one down the line, I’m just a little lost. Thursday there was some drama at work. When I first started here I was a floater–so I would go wherever they needed me that day. It wasn’t so bad, a little boring, but it was all I knew here. In January they placed me permanently in a group with about 8 guys, and two assistants. Since Jan, we’ve lost three guys and it has been decided that our group is going to be merging with another, much larger, group. I was told on Thursday that I will not be merging with the group and will instead be a floater again. She said that it wasn’t anything to do with performance, there was simply enough coverage in the upstairs group and I was needed more elsewhere. Apparently my bosses are very sad to see me go and said they’d do whatever they could to keep me but it looks like it’s a done deal. It is flattering that everyone was so kind but in the end it really sucks. It’s now messing with my Christmas bonus and I’m just afraid of being really bored while floating. It’s not exactly anything glamorous. Still, I’m happy to have a job and need to remember that.

Also on Thursday Alanis‘ new album, “Flavors of Entanglement,” leaked.

I had heard the album in its entirety back in March but was happy to sit down with it again and really dissect it. I have every confidence in saying that this is the best Alanis album since “Jagged Little Pill.” Every one of her albums has something to offer and I really do love all of them but this one is so different for her and is exactly in tune with music today and is a fantastic progression for her. Half of the album is classic Alanis and the other half is stuff she’s never tried before. It’s exhilarating as a fan to experience this musical journey with her and if you’ve ever been a fan of Alanis‘ stuff I encourage you to check the album out.

Friday morning I got up at the butt ass crack of dawn to go see Alanis perform on the Today show. When I got there at 6:45 am she was doing sound check and already the crowds were in full force. I almost got in a fight with an old lady from Iowa because I was trying to cut in front of her. She was not happy with that and I was not wanting to deal with her at 7am so words were exchanged. These people didn’t understand though–I didn’t even care about being on TV or even being in front, I just wanted to be able to see her. I ended up getting a nice spot and saw her sing “Underneath,” “Ironic,” and “Thank U” THREE TIMES EACH. If I wasn’t sick of Ironic before….I sure am now…. Josh Moon joined me at the Today show and it was great hanging out with him and catching up while waiting for Alanis to start. He’s in town for the summer doing an internship and it’ll be great having him here.

Speaking of old friends, I haven’t seen Page Six in three weeks and that makes me sad.

Also speaking of old friends, what a weekend! BFF and I went down to see DC Doug and it was such a fun time! Saturday we were able to meeting up with Laurie and do a little lunch/ice cream/park time. Sunday we went with Quentin to my old friend Christie’s house warming party and it was such a blast. So many drunken, hilarious times. I sure do love my boys!

Back in the city and am supes excited for “Sex and the City” on Thursday. My phone broke last night so I have been dealing with that today as well. I need to go and get it fixed this afternoon and if they can’t fix it, I’ll have to get a new one, which SUCKS. I don’t want to lose all of my numbers!! Plus I was planning on leaving Sprint at the end of August but if I have to buy a new one I might as well just renew my contract and get a good phone. I’m just overpaying and have been really unhappy with Sprint’s customer service. Ah well, I’ll do what I’ve gotta do.

That’s all I’ve got today. It’s good to be back!

It Won’t Be Long Now… May 19, 2008

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Well after a very stressful weekend and some family drama, things are finally looking up. Lay offs at work happened this morning and while I thought I was a goner for sure, I managed to make it through unscathed. Of course now I have to get a tattoo…..I promised BFF if I wasn’t let go I’d get a tattoo. I think I’ve finally decided on what I want and where I want it.

It’s the Kanji symbol for “Strength.” It holds a lot of different meanings to me and I think is something simple and meaningful that I will be glad I got. I will reveal where I end up getting it once it happens so look forward to that later this week. I know many people don’t want me to get a tattoo but I’ve talked about it for so long it’s time to just DO IT! Now that I still have my job BFF and I have decided that a trip to DC is in order for the long weekend this weekend. DC Doug here we come! There are only 10 more days until the Sex and the City movie. A week from Thursday! Tickets have been bought and I cannot wait. Alanis will be at the Today show this Friday and I’m excited to go and see her there. I hope she remembers me.

That is a joke.

Something that DC Doug did a few days ago was post a blog about his pet peeves. I liked his answers and have a few of my own that I’d like to share with you so without further ado….

BRIAN’S TOP EIGHT PET PEEVES/ANNOYANCES

1. People getting on the elevator

My work building has a lot of floors. So we have three different elevator banks with about eight elevators in each bank. I’m on floor 20 which is the second to last floor in my particular elevator bank. I don’t know why, but it drives me CRAZY when people get on the elevator. The worst is when three people get on and pretty 12, 15, 16, 17, 18, etc. so I have all these stops to make before my floor. Again, I don’t know why it bothers me, it just does. I get angry at these people that are just doing the same thing I am but in my head I’m like “oh, what, you can’t walk two floors?” This isn’t so much a pet peeve as it is an annoyance….oh well.

2. Horn Honking

We know you’re there. We see you driving. There is no need to honk your horn and to LEAN on the damn thing. New York is one constant horn honk and I accept that but COME ON.

3. Gross Chicken Fat

Why does there need to be gross shit on pieces of chicken? Can’t they cut that off in the store? I buy chicken breast pre-cut so I DON’T have to deal with crap like that. It grosses me out when I have cut it off and it’s even worse when you miss it and accidentally eat it. ::Shudder::

4. Kitty Litter

For whatever reason, RIGHT after I change my cat’s litter box they feel the need to go in and piss or take a shit. Look, I’m sorry that your box of hell smells nice for ONCE but do you really need to go and ruin the beauty that I just created? You can’t wait FIVE MINUTES? No Me Diga.

5. The Shower Thingy

So you know in shower/baths how they have that little lever you have to pull up to tun the water from a bath to a shower? Well for whatever reason, I hate it when you turn off the shower and the knob doesn’t release and so it just drips, and drips, and drips until you release the remainder of the water or it does it itself. It probably bothers me more cause it’s early morning but I feel like that thing is out to get me.

6. People who stop in the middle of the sidewalk while walking

Pretty self-explanatory. Happens more often than you’d think. Drives me crazy!

7. When the DVR cuts off the preview for next week’s show

Why does it do that? It can’t last thirty more seconds? And for whatever reason you can’t extend the record time. You can have it record earlier, but not later. And that serves no purpose for me. Desperate Housewives and Prison Break are the worst offenders of this. Another thing in the same arena is when you record something and for whatever reason, it doesn’t record. I build up the excitement and look forward to it and then…disappointment.

8. Underarm sweat

It drives me crazy. The worst is when you shower, put deodorant on, and then proceed with your day/night and five minutes later you’re soaked under the arm. I don’t know why it happens, it just does. I’m not looking forward to that happening in the summer.

I’m sure I have a lot more but those are the ones that come off the top of my head. What are your biggest pet peeves?

Going to Musical Monday tonight with BFF and the boys. I’ll do my best to not stand on any booths this time around.

Top Model-y Like a Fat Girl May 15, 2008

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Can I get a big “fat girls unite!” in honor of my girl Whitney winning America’s Next Top Model?! Being the amazing judge of reality shows that I am, I picked Whitney to win waaaay back in the beginning. It’s all a science really. Last year we had a black girl win (Saleshia) the year before that? A Latin Drag Queen (Cha Cha Diva Jaslene). The year before that? A blonde (Caridee). With the exception of Cycle 1 and Cycle 2 (Adrienne and Yohanna) we have not had the same ethnicity win two years in a row. Tyra plans it like that, ya’ll. Seeing as this is Cycle 10, it was OBVIOUSLY time for a plus sized (full-figured, whatever you want to call her) model to win. And if you don’t believe me that I called it, BFF can back me up. So Top Model winners have gone like this–
1. Adrianne (white, ugly stepchild of Top Model)
2. Yohanna (white, brunette)
3. Eva (black)
4. Naima (she was like…asian/black/white)
5. Nicole (white, redhead)
6. Danielle (black)
7. Caridee (white, blonde)
8. Jaslene (Latino drag queen)
9. Salisha (black)
10. Whitney (white, plus size)
So clearly, it’s time for an Asian girl to win next season.
You know what I haven’t talked about on here in a long time? American Idol! Maybe that’s because it has been SO BORING! Seriously! What is up with this season?! It started out really strong but is limping across the finish line. We all know that Archuleta is going to win, which I’m fine with.

He’s just so pretty. I’m actually pulling for David Cook to lose, that way he can have the type of career that he wants. He’s my favorite!!

Last night BFF and I crossed water to go have dinner with Kido, Bridge, Mo, and Matt and watch the Top Model finale. We got a bunch of food and MADE DINNER! Okay well….BFF made dinner. Like, not just grilled chicken or rice but actually food! It was so freakin amazing. Great wine, great Top Model, great friends. I’ll cross water any time for those girls–love them!

I’m feeling a little under the weather today. I think part of it has to do with the fact that I went out pretty hard Monday night after being drunk the majority of the weekend. I’m looking forward to doing a whole lot of nothing this weekend and watching a lot of movies on my couch. I think that my wallet is looking forward to that as well! The other reason I think I’m getting sick is because there is another round of lay offs coming and I’m stressing out. I have no reason to think I’d be let go, but when you know it’s happening and you’re completely in the dark…it’s not a fun place to be!

I’d like to take this opportunity to give a little shout out to Vin. I’ve been very neglectful with emails to him lately and I sincerely apologize. I’d also like to shout out to Taylor who is going to be running a 26.2 mile marathon on Saturday!!! Marathon!!! She and I have both come a long way from getting Wendy’s every night and watching bad movies. I think the fact that she’s running a marathon is absolutely phenomenal. She is going to think of me at Mile 20 and my mental image is supposed to inspire her to run those last six miles. Or something like that.

“The Office” has its season finale tonight. Is Jim going to propose to Pam?!?! I hope so!!!

I totes love them.

I Cun Reed Ril Good. May 14, 2008

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Please appreciate the exchange I just had with an employee of Boston Coach car service:

Me: His last name is F as in Frank, R and in Randy, I as in Igloo, S as in….
Boston Coach: Igloo? Igloo is spelled with an “E.”
Me: Uh….
Boston Coach: Isn’t it?
Me: Uh……
(awkward pause)
Me: Uh……no.

I swear to God, some people….everytime I start to think I’m dumb, I remember people like Carly from Boston Coach who doesn’t know how to spell “igloo” and I feel better about myself.

Hot Tranny Mess May 13, 2008

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First thing’s first – Tony Nominations came out today!!! And do I know how to pick them or what? In the Heights has the most nominations with 13!

Yeaaah boyeee!!!!! I’m super happy because it’s such a great show that deserves to be nominated.

So last night I was incredibly irresponsible. I went with BFF and roomie to Musical Mondays at Splash Bar and it was OFF. THE. HOOK. It was SO much fun!!! I spent money I don’t have and drank like a fish but I can’t believe what a fantastic time I had. During Musical Mondays, they have a bunch of screens around this giant club and they play musical numbers from shows, Tony Award performances, and other live stuff. Of course everyone drinks and starts to sing along the more they drink. A few moments that were particularly special for me:

1. During SPAMALOT’s “Find Your Grail,” I picked up a candle from the table and pretended it was a grail…the entire song. Best part about it is I had gotten separated from the rest of our group so I was doing this completely by myself.

2. Pretending to be in A CHORUS LINE every time it came on screen. Seriously, I danced the hell out of that shit. And dancer I am not.

3. During “Defying Gravity” from WICKED…well…the whole thing was just a mess. In the show she starts flying on a broom towards the climax of the song. And wouldn’t you know it…during the climax I stood up on a booth…and pretended to fly….on a broom…while singing along and pointing to everyone. HOT. MESS.

Roomie and I both met Steve’s that were very fun to hang out with but we decided to call it a night around one. So we drunkenly get on the train….the downtown train! It wasn’t until we got to Canal Street that I was like “um…this is wrong.” I have to say though, it was all worth it!

Am very excited to go home tonight and do nothing. My couch and I are going to be best friends. Going to Brooklyn tomorrow to watch the Top Model finale with BFF, Kido, Bridge, and Mo. Should be good times!!

I’m out!

Singing, Dancing, and Stealing Things May 12, 2008

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I’m writing a blog right now so that I don’t go and buy pretzels out of the vending machine. I just worked out, ate an orange, and now I’m starving again. It’s taking everything I have in me to stick to my diet and not snack. So I need to be distracted. And that’s where you come in! I actually broke on my diet yesterday….broke down and had both sorbet and Mike & Ikes. Bad Brian, bad bad bad.

What a fantastic weekend for new entertainment! Friday afternoon I downloaded Jason Mraz’s new cd, “We Sing, We Dance, We Steal Things.

Upon first listen I wasn’t loving it that much but I have given it a few spins and it’s slowly working its way into my favorites. It’s a very different record than his previous ones–much more acoustic than Mr. A-Z and less “poppy” than “Waiting For My Rocket to Come.” It is a nice mixture of the three and two of the songs have choirs in them! Choirs! I freakin love choirs in songs.

Friday night BFF and Page Six and I went to see “Gypsy” with Patti LuPone.

“Gypsy” is one of those “old” musicals that I’ve been needing to see but just never had the desire to. I’d rather see other musicals 3, 4 times. But BFF brought me and I have to say that I was completely blown away. Patti LuPone is going to win the Tony award, no doubt about that. During the last song of the show, I literally could not breathe–I was holding my breath the entire time. Then, during curtain call, I just let it all go and started bawling. I really enjoyed the show and my time at the show.

Saturday I went shopping in SoHo after a long work out and spent a little bit too much money on new work clothes. It’s sad when you’re excited to buy slacks and ties and plain button down shirts. Had lunch with TanTan and BFF and then we decided to have a little party at A. Rapp’s. He’s out of town so we just had some people over and drank and talked. Asian Carrie Bradshaw, Bridge, Mo, Matt, David, Roomie and others came and it was super great to hang out with them! I had a blast.

Sunday I went to see “In the Heights” for the fourth time…I frakkin love that show. Sunday night BFF, Ben and I went to go see “What Happens in Vegas.”
It was a very enjoyable movie! Cameron Diaz is amazing…I love her. And I actually didn’t hate Ashton Kutcher–he was kinda hot! Lake Bell and Rob Cordry (or is it Nate? Doug–help) were absolutely hilarious as the couples respective best friends. Normally I like cheese in movies but this got VERY cheesy at the end…very eye roll worthy. Overall though, I liked it. “Sex and the City” is currently having their premiere in London and Sarah Jessica Parker wore a very….interesting hat to the movie.

That dress is fierce. The hat? Not s’much.

Tonight I’m meeting up with some friends at Splash for Musical Mondays. I have yet to go so we’ll see what it entails but all I know is that I’m going to need a cat nap before going out! I’m officially getting old.

Ob La Dee, Ob La Da….BRA! May 9, 2008

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Happy Friday everyone! Over here at the Lehman Brothers gym, records are being broken. I just ran three miles! I know it doesn’t sound like much, but there is something you have to understand about me–I’m not a runner. In any sense of the word. I get bored, I get tired, I just can’t do it. But over the past few months I’ve been running more and more. This week I have been running two miles a day, and handling it pretty well. So today I decided to try for three miles. And I did it! So I’m very proud of myself.

Last night, John Krasinski added me as a friend on “Facebook.” I’m not sure if it’s really him, but I’m inclined to think it is for a couple of reasons. 1. He doesn’t have that many friends. Usually those fake celebrity profiles have a lot of friends. 2. We have a friend in common. And the person he’s friends with doesn’t seem to be one to request random celebrities. 3. He gave me limited access to his profile. Normally fake profiles don’t care enough to do that. So that’s that. John and I are bff’s.

Oh, the things I could teach him…

Here are some other people that I am “friends” with online.

Alanis Morissette:

Jason Mraz:

Jennifer Hudson:

The character of Logan from “Gilmore Girls”:

The character of Carrie Bradshaw. Not SJP, but Carrie Bradshaw herself:


And…..Diana Ross.

Clearly I have problems.

Tonight BFF, Page Six and I are going to see Patti Lupone in the revival of “Gypsy.” I hope that Patti’s “Life Goes On” cast member Chris Burke will be there. I don’t know why he would be….but a boy can dream, can’t he?

What a "Day!" May 8, 2008

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Last night Page Six and I went to see “Cry-Baby,” the new musical based on John Waters’ movie of the same name.

I honestly have no idea how I felt about it. It was kind of a hot tranny mess……that I kind of absolutely loved. Is that weird?! I feel like a few of the leading actors (Chris Hanke, Ali Maurzy and Elizabeth Stanley, all pictured) really got the “essence” of the show and completely understood how the comedy worked. They all had fantastic comedic timing and really great voices. There were a few performances that were lacking, mainly James Snyder as Cry-Baby and Chestor Gregory as Dupree, his best friend. I feel like they were both written poorly, but the actors also didn’t bring anything new to the part. The show lacked a certain “something” and is kind of like “Hairspray’s” retarded brother. That being said, it had fantastic choreography and costumes, some really funny supporting characters, and at the time, great music. I say at the time because walking away from the show, I can’t remember a single song that I heard all night. Nothing is stuck in my head. I’m wanting to give it another viewing with BFF mainly to see what his thoughts on it are. Plus I want to see Christopher Hanke again. I have a little bit of a crush.

Dreamy!!
Hey, have you guys seen this picture around town anywhere?

It’s for this amazing new musical called “Glory Days.” It was written by two 23 year-old guys and it’s about a group of friend reunit……oh…..wait…..I’m going to stop telling you about this now because it CLOSED!!! I can hear you saying “oh Brian, that’s nothing, Broadway musicals close all the time.” Yes, that is true. However, how many Broadway shows close after only ONE performance? Glory Days opened Tuesday, May 6….and closed….Tuesday, May 6. So sad. I had heard a few songs from the show and they were predictable and boring. BFF made this picture and I think it’s brill:

Better luck next time, boys.

I have been SUPER boring the past few days. Nothing new going on in my world. I should get back to work (get back? I should START working) but I’ll holla atcha ril soon.

Shameful "Hills" confession #2 May 6, 2008

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Justin Bobby with haircut…..he’s kinda hot, isn’t he?!?! What is wrong with me? All I know is that it’s a total haircute. Oh I’m so ashamed….