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It’s a Sunshine Day February 27, 2009

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It’s a GORGEOUS day here in the New City of York, and what better type of day to have off work!!  I took the day so I can really focus my energies and pack pack pack!!  Took the kittens to the vet this morning and they got a glowing report card.  They both fit in their travel case, so that was nice, and were well behaved at the vet.  Hard to believe I only have a few days left with them.  British Ben comes for a visit next Wednesday and it’ll be great to see him again.  Feels like he left just yesterday!  Not a whole lot of news to report today.  There are screaming kids outside of my window (that’s what I get for living across from a school) but the little girl in the hallway who said “hi kitty” to Carrie and Big totally makes me just forget about those brats screaming….seriously WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING?!  Okay–I’m out.  Wish me lots of luck this weekend and we’ll be back again Monday.  Same time, same place.

Tina-na-naaaaa!!! February 26, 2009

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Seriously?
Are you kidding me?

Do you even KNOW what time it is?
You’re louder than my pants!!

Living in New York, I’m no stranger to loud noises. Sirens, people yelling, horns honking, this is all relatively normal to me. But this morning, I experienced some of the loudest, most annoying, most innapropriate noises I’ve ever heard. I’ve been having some trouble sleeping lately but can usually sleep through until my alarm goes off. I was abruptly awoken by this loud offensive sound. I looked at the clock– “6:14!!! AM?!” I looked out the window and this is what I saw:


Construction. Not only right outside my window, it sounded like it was RIGHT OUTSIDE MY WINDOW, as in, on the fire escape. Who in the WORLD does construction at 6:14 in the morning? Isn’t that illegal!? If it could be captured in a picture, it would be this:

Times like, a million. If the noise were a person, it would be

Fran Dreshcher.
I was seriously so upset. I am definitely NOT going to miss living right by the street after I move. Speaking of moving, AH! Four days!!! I’m terribly behind, but even that isn’t going to stop me from hitting up Ariba, Ariba tonight. No, sir! Taking the day off work tomorrow so hopefully the majority of my stuff will be completed then and I can hang out Saturday night guilt free. Well, guilt free except for the guilt that I’ll feel from sending my kittens away. I wonder if this is what mothers who give their kids up for adoption feel. While packing some clothes away last night, I came across a suitcase I hardly ever use. I decided to check in the compartments to see if there was anything in there and this is what I came across:

Ya’ll don’t even UNDERSTAND. I have been looking for these ties for the past YEAR!! When I moved my stuff to NYC in December ’07, I also packed with me a few ties. I get to my place, and I can’t find them anywhere. I thought for sure I had just thrown them away with the boxes and misc. stuff. HELLZ NO! I FOUND THEM!! It was a happy moment for all involved. So, me.

Speaking of happy moments, I also came across an old friend last night while channel surfing.
Tina Fey: This week, soul diva Diana Ross was sentenced to two days in jail for her drunk driving arrest in Tucson last year. Here now, via satellite from a women’s prison in Los Angeles, is Diana Ross.

Diana Ross: Oooooooh! Hello, Tina! Ow!

Tina Fey: Hi, Diana. How’s it going?
Diana Ross: Not good, Tina! I’m in jail! and, let me tell you something – in jail, they do not call me “Miss Ross.” They call me “Inmate #54899-B.” Ow!

Tina Fey: Wow. So, how are they treating you in there?

Diana Ross: Jail is not a spa, Tina. I realized that, once I got here and looked around for the sauna and the bowl of fresh, green apples. All I found was a tiny rom with a stinky little terlet with no lid, and a very grumpy bunkmate named Roberta.

Tina Fey: Well, since we’ve got you here on live TV, is there anything you want to say to your fans?

Diana Ross: Yessssss! Tina-na-naaa! What I would like to say is: Remember that scene in “Mahogony”, those fantastic photos of me looking glamorous in Rome! Jail is not like that, Tina. Although, really, there is someone that’s a dead-ringer for Billy Dee Williams – except her name is Roberta! I mean, she got a moustache and everything!
Tina Fey: How long have you been in there so far, Miss Ross?
Diana Ross: About twenty minutes! I’m not gonna make it, Tina!
Tina Fey: It’s okay, it’s okay, Diana. You’ll be okay.
Diana Ross: No, it’s not! They took away my Emory board and my hot comb! I’m freakin’ out, Tina!
Tina Fey: Ohhhh, I am so sorry —

Diana Ross: Hey, Tinaaaaaaaa!! Remember in the 1960’s, when I was in the fabulous girl-group The Supremes?
Tina Fey: Yeah.
Diana Ross: And I had twelve #1 songs and eighten Top 10 hits?
Tina Fey: Yes. Of course. We all remember that, yeah. Diana Ross: Jail is not like that either, Tina! It’s quite the opposite! One minute, you’re returning your copy of “V.I. Warshawski” to a Blockbuster in Tucson; and, the next thing you know, you’re in the hoosegow! I’m in the pokie, Tina! I’m in the joint! The slammer! The clink! The can! Uh-oh, I gotta go.. Roberta needs to go to sleep, and she says if I make any noise she’s gonna shank me! Tina-na-naaa!
Tina Fey: Diana Ross! Diana Ross, everybody!

Isn’t She Lovely? February 24, 2009

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Ah, just look at her. Ain’t she pretty? I think she’s pretty much the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen. Well, almost. It’s not nearly as pretty as this:


Or this:


Or this:


But it sure is ril pretty. On a side note, I think that Zac Efron has a small peen. Just an observation. So yeah, what was I talking about? Oh! My new toy!


Ugh, I can’t stand it. She’s so gorgeous. So yes, after the death of my computer this week (by my own hands! I’m a murderer!) I took the plunge and paid one month’s rent to have a new MacBook! I haven’t had a chance to go through all of the fun features but I can tell already that this is going to be a life-changer, just like my iPhone. It’ll make so many things easier, one of them being the filming of my TyraShow spots. I feel a new obsession coming on. Speaking of obsessions…


Miss Kelly Clarkson you are doing me and you are doing me but good. I have not been able to turn off her new cd. Like, physicall unable. Every time I start to listen to other music I just end up going back to hers. She’s amazing.

Something that is less than amazing, however, are the prices for the storage spaces I’m looking at.

If you think the “as low as $29” is too good to be true, well, it is. Dr. Mike and I are looking at places to keep our stuff while we’re both in limbo and oh my gay is it expensive. As in, $300 a MONTH. I’m hoping that we can fit our stuff into a smaller space so as to reduce the costs a bit but who knew that keeping your shit in a small room would be so pricey! Going to check out the spaces after work today, but I have to go to Ant’s, I have to pick up more boxes, and I have, essentially, the entire contents of my apartment to pack still. There’s really just not enough hours in the day. There’s not a lot of time, nope. No time, no time, there’s never any time!!!

There’s no time for singing


no time for Geometry


I’m so excited!

I’m so excited!


I’m so……..scurred.

Oh, and someone buy me this shirt please.

Thank you.

Speaking of no time, I’ve found it very hard to make sure I watch all of the contents saved in my DVR lately. As such, I’ve had to break-up with a few shows that I’ve watched for years but just haven’t kept my attention lately. I’m sorry, when I’d rather watch “RuPaul’s Drag Race” over you…well…it means I’m crazy, but it also means your show sucks. At the beginning of the season I broke up with “Chuck.”

I was mostly sad to leave Zachary Levi, but it had to happen.

Next to fall was “One Tree Hill.”

It’s the poor man’s Dawson’s Creek (sorry Billy) and while I enjoyed it last season and the beginning of this season, I have too many shows that conflict with the time slot that I had to give it up. Plus, I REALLY hate some of the acting on the show (I’m talking to YOU James Lafferty and the black guy who plays Skillz).

Yesterday, I encountered quite possibly the hardest break-up of all.

“Heroes”!!!!!

I just can’t do it anymore. The plot lines have gotten ridiculous and CONFUSING and this is coming from a former comic book geek!!! Plus I found that I hate the majority of the actors on the show. Milo, Ali Larter, Hayden Panniterrible, Mohinder, the Asian guy….I just can’t handle them any more so I’m ripping off the band-aid. Seems that is happening a lot this week! Oh my God, you know what I should do? I should make one of those “R.I.P.” shirts for Carrie and Big!! They have them for B.I.G. and Tupac

It would be totally fetch to have one for the kittens.

Oh, I’ll miss those hairy little buggars. Sorry the blog has been a little sparse this week, but I have been racing around like a mad-man. Hopefully things will calm down next week. Enjoy your hump day!

The Face Says It All February 24, 2009

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Monday Tidbits February 23, 2009

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Happy Monday everyone. You know how I feel about Monday’s, so I’ll say that I’m cranky and tired and we’ll move on. I’ve got a bit of an overwhelming week coming up, with lots of moving crap to do and we’re T-Minus 6 days on saying goodbye to the kittens. While I’m not going to miss being a “cat lady,” I’m absolutely going to miss them.

So how much am I loving deaf Luke and his mom Margie on this season’s “Amazing Race?”

He’s adorable, they work well together, and I love me a good handi. This season has midgets, gay dad and gay son, black girls, asians, and a deaf guy. It’s like a diversity training within a reality show.

Friday was a heavenly day as Kelly Clarkson’s new album was leaked on the internet.

I’m a fan of Kelly with whatever she does but I have to say, the album is amazing. A-MAH-zing. There are a number of songs where I’m like “oh, she sounds like so and so” but other than that and one or two boring ballads, the album is perfection. Of course, I accidentally clicked a link that caused my computer to crash, never to return, but I was planning on getting a laptop soon anyway.

Saturday night was the opening night party for B.A.D. (Big Apple Dodgeball) It was tons o’ fun and great to see peeps I haven’t seen in a few weeks. I found out that I’m on TEAM EAGLE!!!

The Eagle is a bar in the meatpacking district (he he) that is known for leather, daddies, and leather daddies. One of my favorite New York memories involved Spencer and visiting this bar, before we knew what kind of bar it was. At the time it was terrifying but looking back–hilarious. Tonight is the first night that the “Balled Eagles” (yeah, I know) will be playing and while I could use to stay home and pack, hopefully it’ll be a fun time and I won’t break anything.

Did you hear that the Oscars were last night? I had the please of watching it with some Game Night people and about nine chocolate chip cookies, pretzels, and beer. Yum in my tum. I was very pleased with the show, entertained, and generally happy with all the winners. A few thoughts:

Best Dressed:

Now I love SJP, that much is well known. But I truly believe she was one of the best dressed at the awards last night. The kind of off-white sea foam green, tulle skirt, and belt? Perfection. Upon a closer view, however, I noticed something I haven’t really noticed before.

HelllOOOOOOOO boobies! Where the hell did those come from?! I mean, I know that they’re pretty pushed up there but holy mama!!! SJ 32D is more like it!


Perfection

Natalie Portman is perfection and can do no wrong. This skit with Ben Stiller was v. v. funny, but her amazing look made it all the better. Another favorite of mine?

Oscar nominee herself Anne Hathaway. Gorgeous.
Less Than Perfection

Slutty Cyrus apparently didn’t get the memo that the Little Mermaid auditions had been canceled.

I really, really don’t like her. Miley Fail.


Hot Tranny Mess Part 1

I thought that RuPaul’s Drag Race was on Monday’s nights? What is Miss. Dementia doing at the Oscars…..wait….that’s who? Sophia Loren? Oh…my…um…..scary clown!!!

Hot Tranny Mess Part 2
Seriously. What the fuck is wrong with Cojo’s face?

Hilarity at the Oscars? Since when?!

Two moments that had me DYING were:

Seth Rogan and James Franco “Pineapple Expressing” all over the serious nominees. If you saw it, you know what I’m talking about. Awesome.

Steve Martin and Tina Fey’s into speech for Best Screenplay. Deadpan, brilliant time, two true comedic geniuses. I’m just so sad that Steve Martin didn’t bring out his banjo band.



Hot Tranny Mess Part 3

Musical numbers? Good.

Hugh Jackman, Beyonce, Zefron, Amanda Seyfried, Dominic Cooper on one stage? Bueno.
Musical numbers of songs from musicals? Si.

The musical number starring said stars at last night’s ceremony? NEIN. It was just messy, uncoordinated, and didn’t flow very well. I felt like I was having a bit of an epileptic seizure for the majority of it. Maybe next time kiddies.

Score one for the homos

Dustin Lance Black winning Best Original Screenplay for “Milk.” Who knew there were hot writers out there!!! He had such a touching speech and I’m not going to lie that I got a little teary when he thanked his mother for ”loving me for who I am,” and when he addressed all the ”gay and lesbian kids out there tonight who…are beautiful, wonderful creatures of value.” Well, except for this gay creature.

I don’t know that he’s beautiful or wonderful. As far as his value…well…that’s debatable.


Score Two for the homos

Sean Penn gone done and won the Best Actor Oscar! I thought that Mickey Rourke might win, but had a feeling in my gut all night that Sean would take it. “You commie, homo-loving sons of guns.” Hilarious! I thought he had a great speech and hearing all of the support for equal rights coming from him and the majority of the awards was a nice surprise. Sure enough if the tears didn’t come again….

And who can forget…


The hair? meh. The dress? eh. The win? AMAZING. So happy for her.

New blog up on Tyrashow.com

Check it out here

Off to get some work done before Dball tonight. Peace oot bitches.

Lisp-Free Truth Booth! February 20, 2009

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And yes, I picked that screen grab on purpose. Check it out here

Like a band aid…. February 19, 2009

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Well I’ve got some news about my housing situation and it’s still hard for me to swallow but I’m stickin‘ to it! Here’s the deal: I will be sending my cats to live with BFF Kristen in Utah, putting my stuff in storage, and going to live rent-free in Ant Rapp’s place for the next little bit. AH! The housing situation with Billy is kind of taking its time to come to fruition, so instead of finding some studio I hate or can’t afford, I thought it best to take this course of action. I’m definitely sad to part with my kittens, but I’ve been thinking about it for quite some time and it just needs to happen. Like Spencer says, “Just rip off the band aid.” They’re going to live with her and her new husband and I know that they’ll be happier there than they are in New York in a tiny apartment. She’s had cats all her life and knows mine well so I’m a little at peace with knowing they’ll be going to a loving home and won’t be separated. Hopefully with the way this goes, I’ll be able to save a little money until a) the Billy apt. thing works out or b) I can find a roomie or place in HK because truthfully, that’s where my heart is. I love that neighborhood and am not ready to leave it. So like a band aid…come March 1….

Okay. Enough of that. I’ve got a quick little post today–still under the weather and swamped at work. Before I get back to that though, a mini Thursday edition of…

OH HELL TO THE NO


Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen are Engaged
H2TN rating: 6

Clearly he’s a homosexual, so what kind of a ruse is this? Also, she belongs with Adam Brody. Relationship Fail. Summer and Seth 2gether 4Evah!!

Max from THE MAX Doing Magic for Britney Spears’ Tour
H2TN Rating: 3

This is more of a good “hell to the no.” I know you all know Max. He was the creepy magician that always did magic when all the Saved By the Bell kids wanted a freakin‘ hamburger. Seeing as Brit Brit’s tour is all about the “circus” a magician is only appropriate. I just hope that Max still has that amazing afro. I also hope I get to see this tour. Hint Hint P6. thanks to Page Six for the image


Pamela Anderson Should Not Be Wearing That
H2TN Rating: 8
Dear Pamela Anderson. You are old. Please don’t wear this in public. No one needs to see that, and by no one, I mean NO ONE. And don’t even get me started on your face, tranny.
Jon Hamm look-alike next to me in Spin Class
H2TN Rating: about a 16

Today in Spin Class I had, on the bike next to me, a Jon Hamm look-alike. Don Draper himself. He was tan, he was hot, his Jon Hamm hair kept getting in his face, he was all kinds of sweaty, and he kept moaning when the hills got tough. To make matters worse, there was a mirror in front of us and I kept finding myself staring at him. Not jumping his bones was one of the hardest things I’ve done. That’s what she said.


American Idol’s Danny Gokey’s exploitation of his dead wife

H2TN Rating: Off the charts

Photo credit: Rickey.org

Hey!! Did you guys hear about Danney Gokey? Oh man, he’s this awesome guy who’s got a really cool sounding voice and OH MAN his wife died four weeks into their marriage oh man that really sucks. Fail. I totally get that he has a compelling story and I really do feel bad for his wife and for him but seriously people? EVERY. CHANCE. HE GETS. We hear about this dead wife. Last night during the results show was the worst. While singing “Hero” (dedicated to his dead wife) a member of his family held up a picture of the two of them together. When will he be voted off so the exploitation can end? Let her rest in peace already!

And that was your Thursday edition of “Oh Hell to the No.”

And now please take a second to the hottest member of MTV News ever, Gideon Yago.

I know all you bitches remember him!

America’s Next Top Prostie February 18, 2009

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The Las Vegas Review Journal posted a list of “Las Vegas’ 50 Most Prolific Prostitutes” and boooyyyyyyy, there are some lookers in the bunch! I can understand why guys would want to sleep with women, I can even understand why some losers would want a prostitute–but if you’re going to get a prostie, wouldn’t you at least want something semi-attractive? Or you could just go to the Bunny Ranch!

Don’t front, I know you all know what the Bunny Ranch is.

In honor of America’s Next Top Model Cycle 12 starting in a few weeks, I decided to play Tyra with the ladies of the Vegas 50.

“I have 14….beau…lovel…attrac….whorey girls in front of me. But only one can be America’s…. Next….Top….Prostie. The girl whose name I do NOT call, must immediately go back to their corner, pack their three belongings, and leave.”

Shiny

Shiny, you had the best picture in the bunch this week. Keep it up. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“The next name I am going to call is….

Asian Brite.”

“You passed the makeup challenge today with flying colors. Those fake eyelashes done saved you guurrrrl. Congratulations you’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“Red.”

“After a rough start, you have emerged from the background and really proved yourself this week. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“The next name is…

Claudia Schiffer.”

“Claudia, I know that you’re disappointed it has come down to this, but you need to take your attitude and check. It. At. The. Corner. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“Bucky.”

“Your decision this week to forego the tooth reduction surgery I offered you was the wrong one but I’m hoping that next week you will reconsider and continue to excel in this competition. Congratulations, you’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“The next name…is….

Fugly.”

Guuuurrrrllll, I am LOVING your makeover and I give you props for staying so strong during the six hour bleaching process. Unfortunately though, you failed to smile with your eyes in this week’s picture. If you can’t correct that next week, you will be in danger. Of. Going. Home. Congratulations, you’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“The next name I am going to call….is…

Al Sharpton.”

“Al, you still don’t know how to work your makeover look. Instead of you wearing the hair, you are letting the hair. Wear. You. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“Lazy Eye.”

“I love that you didn’t let the bruise on your shoulder stop you from rocking in the challenge this week, but you still need to figure out what to do with your face in pictures because that smile….guuuurrrrll…it ain’t all that. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“Pimply”

“Pimply, I have told you time and time again–SMILE with the eyes. All I see….is anger. No smiles. I need smiles. Smiling. With the eyes. Smile. Eyes. And gurlll, wash your damn face before you go to bed. No one needs to look at that. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“The next name is…

E.T.”

“E.T., when I said you needed a more drastic look, this is not what I meant. I wanted to ACCENTUATE the forehead and instead, you’re completely hiding it. Same with the eyebrows. I wanted subtle, and you went completely the wrong way. I am so. Dis. sa. poin. ted. in you this week. You need to figure out how to get it right, or you WILL go home. Wha–Are you laughing? This is a joke to you. You’ve been through anger management. You’ve been through your grandmother getting her lights turned off to buy you a swimsuit for your competition. And you go over there and you joke and you laugh. This is serious to these girls and this should be serious to you. Do you know that you had a possibility to win? Do you know that all of America is rooting for you? Do you know that? And then you come in here and you treat this like a joke? You come in here and look at that and say “I can’t read that”? You read ten times better than half of those girls over there!!!! Ugh. I can’t even look at you. Here. Take your damn picture.”

“The next name is…

Brows.”

“Brows, what are we gonna do with those brows? At any rate, congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“Piglet”

“Honey Child, you were dangerously close to going home this week. I have told you time and time again—you can’t lift your head up in pictures as you have a snout! Either fix this next week, or you. Will. Be. Going. Home. Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie.”

“I only have one picture left in my hand. And this picture represents the girl who is still in the running to become America’s. Next. To. P. Pro. s. tie. As I’ve said before, the girl whose name I do. not. call. must immediately go back to their corner. Pack up their shit. And leave.

Sleepy.

You have so. Much. Potential. But you need to figure out a way to make that potential come across in pictures.

And Skeletor.

Guuurrrlll, your makeover helped a little bit, but your face still ended up being a big. Ol. Mess. So who goes home? The girl with all the potential but doesn’t know how to use it? Or the girl who is just. Plain. Ugly.

……

…..

……….

Sleepy.


Congratulations. You’re still in the running to become America’s Next Top Prostie. That means Skeletor, I’m so sorry. It’s time for you to leave. But don’t give up your dream! I expect to see you on streets again VERY soon.”

Coming up next week: Will a Urinary Tract Infection sideline Asian Brite and risk her future in the competition? Only a Free Clinic knows for sure. And: Shiny and E.T. are involved in an altercation and one of the girls. Goes. Home.
In real life news, I’m officially sick, homeless and hungry. WOO HOO!!!

DC Doug Photo Bonanza! February 17, 2009

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Terrible Tuesday rears its ugly head, yet again! After far too fun of a weekend, I’m a titch cranky to be back at work but it’s what pays the bills so I gotta keep on keepin‘ on! ‘Why a fun weekend’ you may ask? Well…..

DC DOUG WAS IN TOWN!!!!!!

Yup, after much poking, prodding and begging, he finally got his skinny ass up to the New York from DC. Hmm….a New York visit? You know what that means–

PHOTO BONANZA!!!!

Doug got in Friday night and he, Scott D, Page Six and I went to go have dinner at Arriba Arriba. Due to the fact that hunger and drinking overtook our desire to take pictures, I have none from that night. After dinner, we went down to meet up with Spenc and his sister Faith, who was also in town. The four of us ended up at a bar in HK and drank/did shots til the wee hours of the morning, pouring ourselves into bed around 4:30 am. Ouch!!

Saturday morning was brunch at Film Center Cafe.

I’ve had many, many great meals here but I’ve also had the worst service of my life on several occasions. This morning being one of them. We waited FOREVER to get our drinks, I was totally hangry (hungry + angry = hangry) and was definitely on the verge of hulking out. It was a good thing I had a coat made of kittens to keep me company.

“Pretty coat…pretty coat….”

Spencer and Faith ordered some eggs bernadine crap and the first time it came out, the kitchen had completely messed it up so Spenc sent it back. Well, it came out messed up YET AGAIN and needless to say, S wasn’t happy and had to get his angry voice on. It was quite humorous hearing him say “This is completely wrong, again. I can’t even look at it, please take it away.”

Breakfast Fail.
Luckily, everyone was drunk enough that they were willing to pose for a photo with me.

After brunch it was on to SoHo, for a little shopping. On the way, I made everyone stop for pictures for which they all complained about. Hey! I’m trying to savor the memories so put a freakin‘ smile on your face, say cheese, and shut it!


For whatever reason, my head is fifteen times bigger than Doug’s.

That’s what she said.

Page Six and I, after many failed attempts, took what is quite possible the best picture of us ever.


We totally look like a couple.

After shopping and a quick nap, Spencer, Doug, Faith and I treated ourselves to some deeelicious sushi.


We were lucky enough to have Wolverine himself, Mr. Hugh Jackman, stop at our table to say hi.
SNIKT!”

Our bellies full, we walked a few blocks to attend Bryan Sanchez’s Anti-Valentine’s Day Party, which ended up being a lot of fun. Lots of drinking, lots of single homos, and lots of laughs later, we all posed for a group picture.

I can name about six people in this picture. The rest–absolutely no clue.

Two of the people in the picture I know and love are….


Dougums and Faithy!!! Aw, so cute. Photo Success (hand motion here).

Towards the end of the night Bryan thought it would be a great idea to run and jump on his bed and take a picture while doing so. The end result wound up being multiple “yikes…” photos and one amazing “deserves to be in MSNBC’s ‘Week in Review’ Slide Show” photo.

Photo Credit: John Douglas Smeath

Spencer and Norman’s “sexy face.” You know it’s Spencer’s face by the puckering of the lips. This photo actually looks quite familiar…..

What is it about homos and the missing eye?

At the night crept on, we started coming up with drinking games.

Apparently someone wasn’t a fan? Thumbs down? Game Fail? Hm…I remember it being fun!
Beaux and Faith started taking some inappropriate pictures…

…which ended up being like, the greatest pictures ever. Porn Success!!

Husband and I had a gorgeous family portrait, which I ended up deleting in my drunken haze. Upon realizing this fact, I made him take another one.

Not as successful, but it works! So fun to hang out with Hubby!

After Bryan’s, we all went to The Ritz where we met up with Scotty, Kelly, and Stewart.


Kelly didn’t end up making it into the picture…Yeah….sorry ’bout that.

I noticed a guy near me had pretty much the same outfit on as I did so I went up to talk to him and the following exchange happened:

Me: We have the same outfit on, don’t we?
Matt: We do. Hi I’m Matt.
Me: Hi, I’m Davis. (Davis is my fake name I give to people I’m not sure I want to talk to)
(chit chat, chit chat, chit chat)
Matt’s friend comes up.
Mike: Hi, I’m Mike
Me: Brian
Matt: Brian? I thought you said your name was Davis?
Me: Oh, it is. I just told you it was Davis in case you were crazy.

Which ended up not being, to my surprise. It was quite the awkward moment. Wah Wah.

Sunday Brunch Doug and I went to Eatery, and on the way he ran into the Little Mermaid poster that had been haunting him all weekend.

Doug loves children but he did NOT like that little girl. Said she creeped him out. Rightfully so!

After brunch we decided to do a little more shopping (for some reason, shopping was a recurring theme this weekend) and I was having a bit of trouble with the tourists. They were in FULL EFFECT on Sunday and I was being the snarky New Yorker who makes fun of them.


Yay New York!

On the way to dropping me off at my play reading, I ran into a photo opportunity I could not pass up. Remember in Muppets Take Manhattan when everyone is looking for Kermit?


Keeeerrmmiiitttt!”

Well, I just had to do it…

Keeerrrrmiiittt!” What you can’t tell about this picture is that, like Dr. Teeth, I also have a puppeteers hand up my ass!

Page Six and DC Doug were so lovely to come to my reading (which isn’t as bad as I think it is apparently) and afterwards we took in the delicious Chelsea Grill for a late night meal. Photo Opportunity!

This picture was taken by our Sandra Oh lookin‘ waitress who had a nasty group of foreigners at the table next to us. I felt sorry for her until I kept having to look at her ass crack, then I just wanted her to go away.

After dinner, Doug and I decided to take in a pitcher at Rudy’s. While there, “Purple Rain” came on the jukebox. While that may not mean a lot to you, it certainly did to us. “Purple Rain” is the song that Doug would sing at karaoke when he was drunk. It always took him a lot to get up there and sing it but it was always a crowd pleaser. Now, I haven’t heard this song in years and the first time I do I’m with Doug? Amazing.

On the way home, Doug ran into his favorite friend again and decided to have a change of heart.

We had a few more beers at home, and called it a (relatively) early night. He got up early the next day, headed to the bus, and I was alone again, naturally. Doug was the PERFECT New York guest and we had such a fun time together. What I love about Doug is that we can go a year without seeing each other and when we get together it’s like no time has passed. So crazy to think that this year will be ten years of us being best friends. I love me some DC Doug!

Had my reading again last night and then came home and CRASHED. Today is the start of a new day. It’s the start of a month long diet for me. I hate it, but it’s time–swimsuit season is just around the corner! No candy, no fast food, no ice cream. The rest is just eating smart and exercising my ass off. It’s never fun, but sometimes it’s necessary. I’ve got the last night of my reading tonight, and then the first exciting night of American Idol. It’s sure to be a rockin‘ good time!

kittens inspired by kittens February 15, 2009

Posted by britunes2 in Uncategorized.
3 comments

The most amazing video—-EVER!!!!!!